Maybe Baby: An Infertile Love Story - Wrap up

Matthew M.F. Miller and his wife Constance began their quest to start a family in June of 2006 only to find they were one of millions of couples to grapple with infertility. When he searched for blogs about infertility written from a man’s point of view, Miller found nothing. So he created one. The blog Maybe Baby, led to a book, Maybe Baby: An Infertile Love Story that’s just as endearing, funny and frank.

The parent bloggers who reviewed this book found many words and phrases used to describe Miller’s memoir like “candid, revealing, and entertaining” and “compelling and romantic without being sappy.”

The book begins with the couple wanting to start their family. “They are waiting, saving up money, getting everything in order. Then they make the decision to start trying for a baby. They try and they try, and while they are certainly having fun trying, they aren’t getting the positive sign on the pregnancy tests. So they turn to doctors, drugs, and diet,” explains a reader.

Miller writes about the obstacle course “which includes,’flat tires’ and ‘no semen after noon’ rules at the hospital. And of course there is the financial aspect,” adds a blogger who quotes from the book, “We keep paying to have wands shoved in your hoo-ha, for me to masturbate at the hospital, and for us to be criminally disappointed every month.”

The story, says one reviewer, “is told with wit and grace and frustration and heartache.” But the book is also filled with honesty and humor. “And not just a little bit of honesty and humor. A LOT of honesty and humor.” But this same writer takes care to add that, “Matt easily finds the tone and uses it with great care and effect. After all, those awkward moments in the doctor’s office…let’s just say it made me thankful to be a woman.”

The subject of infertility is one most would consider a depressing subject. But Maybe Baby is anything but. “In a way, I feel bad for laughing at some points; and yet my chuckles are testament to Matthew Miller’s amazing ability to entertain and engage his readers. We forget at times that this novel has a heartbreaking longing at its core, and yet we cannot forget because Miller’s personality is such that we can’t help thinking ‘This guy would make such an excellent dad!’,” marvels one reviewer.

A few of our reviewers, who’ve experienced infertility issues themselves, could completely understand the anguish of the author and his wife: “He blames their fertility problems on the damage done to his body by carrying nearly 500 pounds for several years,” sympathizes one blogger. “Dissecting each of your past sins to find a possible cause of your inability to conceive a child is familiar territory.” Another blogger who also knows all too well what Miller and his wife have faced, says the author, “gives you a good window into what it really feels like to be on that side of the fence. If you have been through it, then you find in Matthew a blood-brother of sorts.”

Speaking of the other side of the fence, for some, Maybe Baby served as an eye-opening experience. “I walked away from reading the book with a greater sensitivity and awareness to the fertility struggles that 6.1 million Americans face. Honestly, it had never crossed my mind that asking a married couple “Do you have kids?” would be an inappropriate question, and I’m still not sure that it’s inappropriate to ask in every context, but I’ll certainly be more thoughtful in the future“.

But the book, many of our bloggers have insisted, is a love story too. “This couple was determined to weather the storm together. And that was the facet of this story that I related to the most,” shares one reviewer. She also writes, “Because even when we were at our lowest, burying our stillborn son, I always knew we had each other’s back. We were going through it together. More than anyone else, my husband knew what I was going through and it was the same for him. In fact, I would argue that a couple needs to come together in order to make it through infertility intact.”

But the couple’s story doesn’t end with the final pages of the book. There’s a pregnancy! Tune into Miller’s blog to cheer them on.

Parent Bloggers Network co-founder Kristen Chase interviewed Matthew on her blog talk radio show Sept. 17. To hear the podcast, click HERE!

This entry was posted on Tuesday, September 30th, 2008 at 5:00 am and is filed under Books. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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Maybe Baby: An Infertile Love Story - Wrap up

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