Girlology: Hang-Ups, Hook-Ups, and Holding Out - Here’s What They’re Saying So Far

One of the attractions of the parenting blogger community is the comforting knowledge that none of us are alone in our struggles. Someone else - who doesn’t live next door or have a child in the same pre-school class - has endured or is enduring the same trials and tribulations that we are. The camaraderie itself is enormously reassuring, even when there are no easy answers to our questions.

My former fifteen year-old self, who still lurks about inside me, felt that same sort of love as I read the blogger reviews of Girlology: Hang-Ups, Hook-Ups, and Holding Out.

A couple of paragraphs in particular jumped out at me - from bloggers whom I would have loved to have had as friends way back when:

Less dangerous. Amen to that.

This book is about helping girls learn to take care of themselves. “The authors cover the physiological and psychological changes that accompany adolescence (including the serious and prevalent problems of depression and cutting behavior), the pros and cons of different methods of birth control, the dangers associated with drugs and alcohol, symptoms of the most common sexually transmitted diseased (STDs), the specifics of pelvic exams, and the definition of sexual assault (plus ways to avoid getting into a situation where assault might occur).” While it does cover sexually charged topics in depth - “the section on swallowing semen and blue balls made me want to close the book and whip out a rosary” - its focus is “the art and science, if you will, of talking to your daughters (or any other young woman in your life) about relationships, their bodies and sexuality.”

As uncomfortable as these discussions may be for us, we don’t want our daughters to repeat our own discovery processes in which we tried “to sort out sex, body issues, and relationships based on teenage rumors and hearsay.” We realize that this is “…information that girls need,” and as one blogger noted: “I’d rather that they get it from a book like this than their friends. Wait, I’d rather that they get it from me, while we read this book together.” And since many of us never had these kinds of intimate discussions with any adult female role model - “I learned things only via the rather dry biological descriptions in sex-ed, but didn’t get the real scoop on what everyone else was doing. What is really normal for a teenager: in looks, in function, in level of experience in the sexual arena?” - we recognize the importance of helping our children navigate the uncertainties they will face.

Several bloggers who don’t have daughters eagerly read and reviewed this book - for a variety of reasons:

The book is engaging for both teens and adults - “Girlology answers all those burning preteen and teen questions with frank honesty, humor and age appropriate text. Sprinkled through out the book are myth busts, doc talk, think it through flow charts (I love these), and real life dilemmas which teach by example.” - but retains its medical authority throughout. Being physicians, the authors urge teens to consider “the challenges, benefits, rewards, and risks that come with sexual activity.” They unwaveringly advocate abstinence, because “According to Holmes and Hutchison, it’s not only that abstinence prevents infection and pregnancy. Just as important is that boys’ brains take longer than girls’ to develop the parts that make them understand emotional intimacy, romantic feelings, and commitment (p. 17).” Teen boys and teen girls don’t view sex through the same lens at all - and most teens of either gender don’t fully understand that. Reading Girlology (and discussing it with a receptive and loving role model) can help teen girls better comprehend the reasons why sex really is a big deal.

We’ve got several more reviews of Girlology: Hang-Ups, Hook-Ups, and Holding Out coming up - check them out, and then come back to PBN for our final round-up review!

Fri 9/7 - Formula Fed and Flexible Parenting
Mon 9/10 - And the Pursuit of Happiness, Snarky Momma
Tues 9/11 - Radioactive Girl
Wed 9/12 - Hello Pushkin, PunditMom
Thurs 9/13 - Chaos Theory, Jumping Monkeys
Fri 9/14 - Mama Drama Stephanie
Mon 9/17 - Round-Up Review on PBN

This entry was posted on Thursday, September 6th, 2007 at 5:00 am and is filed under Books. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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Girlology: Hang-Ups, Hook-Ups, and Holding Out - Here’s What They’re Saying So Far

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